Home

I've never quite felt at home

I have connections to a lot of places

But none of them are home

And over the last couple of months

I still haven't found home here

And I don't think I will

But that's okay because I've come to realize that home isn't really a place

Home is in people

Home is in midnight trips to Bob's donuts

Home is in feeling adopted in each in every 10:01, becoming an honorary member of a culture you've never been exposed to

Home is in midnight karaoke sessions where you sing your heart out even though you know you're completely tone-deaf

Home is in trips to the beach where no one wears enough warm clothing and everyone huddles together

Home is in the camaraderie of realizing it's past 11 pm and you missed the deadline and still celebrating with those that have already submitted

Home is in venting to your roommates and feeling that they really care about you so much

Home is in that warm feeling you get when one of your peers does something great

That pride you feel because you know if it's good for them in some way it's good for you

Home is in staying up till 4 am to watch a rugby final with a friend and not missing your family quite as much as you would alone

Home is in homesickness being softened by hugs and snacks and company

Home is in finding people who support you in buying way too many books

Home is in going outside of your comfort zone because you know someone else is going there with you

Home is in the adrenaline pumping through you while you hold signs with your friends at a climate strike

Home is in midnight kitchen conversations about life and love and mostly about food

Home is in looking into a piece of someone's soul on a Monday night

Home is in the excitement of a Friday night Between The Lines Event

Either basking in the talent of your classmates or

Making an absolute fool of yourself in improv in the best manner possible

Home is in laughing about your shared disasters, it's in being cranky about lost sleep but still not wanting to trade in the previous night for anything

Home is in spur of the moment decisions to go out somewhere and have a wild, amazing time

Home is in those slowing growing friendships, where before you know it, their presence makes you feel a tiny bit safer

Home is in ice cream parties and carving pumpkins

Home is in freezing mezzanine movie nights

Home is in sharing tea

Home is in not being afraid to show who you truly are

Hone is in sharing your clothes, your blanket, your cutlery, your notes

Home is in always being down for a good conversation

Home is in sitting with someone without talking and it not being awkward

Just being together in a comfortable silence

Home is hard to define

But that's okay

Because home is whatever makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside

At least that's what home is to me

Hellcat (2019)